Many men in relationships might find themselves in situations similar to that of Kevin Spacey's character Lester Burnham in American Beauty. Somewhere along the way after meeting a woman who you thought made you happy, you ended up making sacrifice after sacrifice. Now, you live day to day numb to reality because you have allowed it to take so much. Your only hope in life is for it all too just end and the sooner the better. In American Beauty Lester's life was just that hopeless until his daughters friend gave him hope when he was eavesdropping on them and heard her say she would do him if he worked out a little and got in shape. Suddenly his life had some type of hope and that hope opened his eyes to what he had become and why. Everything he did was because of his wife with whom he no longer was even intimate with. In essence his life was based on nothing in order to please a wife he didn't really have. In other words he was a man with nothing to lose. Many times a man gets involved in a relationship because the sex was good or she is the sexiest woman he has ever known. As time goes on the sex becomes less and less but the sacrifices become more and more. This generally happens to men who come from a position of weakness when it comes to women. These are the guys who don't believe they know how to attract the type of women that they want, so when they find a woman that is close to what they want they settle for her and when she starts making demands and asks you to make sacrifices you do it, not because you want to but because you don't want to lose what you have. Meanwhile, men who come from a position of strength generally don't find themselves in these types of situations because if they are with a woman who demands or asks them to make a sacrifice that they don't want to do; then they don't do it and are prepared to walk if necessary. Most of the time he ends up not having to walk, however, on the occasion he does he knows that he can find another woman just as good. The good news for men who are in relationships, that are or are beginning to take their soul away is that they can be like Lester and reclaim your life. I don't know if you realize it or not but hope is always there and with the proper coaching any man can become a man who knows how to attract the type of women you deserve. The only real question is when you will decide to make that change. |
